Just as I accepted my footing where I stand, the rug gets pulled out from under me. This change is a big one and has my mind attempting to take me to places I don’t want to go. Everything happens for a reason – this I know and believe. But that doesn’t lessen the pain or clear the confusion. In time as I transition through this change I will gain clarity, but here in the present, I’m stumbling.
I already miss you and you’re not even gone. And you weren’t even here to miss! So why is your news of the change tearing me apart? Why am I dreading a change that doesn’t change me? How do I find my way back to myself? The range of emotions I feel have me in distress. Applying everything I’ve learned to take away the pain and put the focus back on myself. But despite my best efforts, I still catch my mind wondering and before I know it, the fear sets in. The transition through this change isn’t going to be easy. But when is change ever easy? Especially one that you did not ask for or want to become your reality.
But the silver lining is that all changes are temporary and this one will be no exception. Our worlds are always changing. It is one of the paradoxes of success. The things and the ways in which got us to where we are, are seldom those that keep us where we are. So here we go – change is happening – another ending is the beginning. We’re letting go of the old to create the new. I’m transitioning through change again.
Change is external – it happens to people, whether they agree with it or not.
Transition is internal – what happens in people’s minds as they go through change.
Change can happen very quickly, while transition occurs more slowly and is likely a journey of emotions. Transition is psychological and is a 3 phase process: all transitions have an ending, followed by a period of confusion and distress, leading to a new beginning. Every transition begins with an ending. We have to let go of the old things before we can pick up the new – not just outwardly, but inwardly, where we can keep our connections to the people and places that anchor us. ~ William Bridges, Transitions. Making Sense of Life’s Changes.
Time moves on – People Shape and Shift – Nothing stays the same – Things Change – that’s just the way it is. The minute we accept our present, all we know changes and we’re forced to adapt. It’s the ever-changing process of life. It’s how we grow and evolve, but it’s not always easy nor makes sense. The ebbs and flows can be scary, sad, or disappointing but there’s nothing we can do to change the course of life, so we transition through it. We adapt and continue on. We wake up the next day afresh, put one foot in front of the other and attempt to keep our footing long enough to stay upright. We must adapt to our every-changing world because it will never adapt to us. How we adapt is our transition. It’s how our mind (and body) process through the change.
It’s taken years for my mind to go through the transition of the distance placed upon us. I went through the 3 phases. I saw it ending, followed by a period of confusion trying to understand the “why” and days upon days of distress wishing things were different, and just as I adapt and get excited for the possibilities, change has come again, and I’m forced into a new beginning. While I fully grasp the concept of reality and understand the fact this change is happening, it does not mean I like it. It does not mean I don’t wish for something different. But I must keep reminding myself that nothing is everlasting, and anything can happen at any moment in our ever-changing world. I must adapt and after the emotions subside, I’ll see the new beginning. I’ll understand the change because I transitioned through it.
Maybe the transition will be easier this time…likely not, but I can hope and try. I’ll adapt just as I’ve always done, but just because I will adapt does not mean I’ll forget or ever stop believing. There’s a reason for this change just as there has been for all the others before. And all those have brought us here to this change. The ending is here, and the beginning has begun.
Love Always prevails.
“If we want things to stay as they are, things will have to change.” ~ Charles Handy, The Age of Paradox
Real Life Talk 